5 things you should not confuse for love.

When we are young we are bombarded by all this different ideas and concepts of what romantic love is, first we see it in out parents then we see it in movies, tv shows and books, when the time  comes  for us to be in our own love story often things are not what we thought and we accept and do things that we definitely should not.

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Jealousy. 

First of all there’s almost NOTHING as unattractive as a jealous partner! One of the main reasons behind this behavior is the belief that you are not good enough, or interesting enough to keep a partner attention on you, so you are terrified that someone else will come and take their affection from you. A little jealousy is normal but an extreme behavior where it affects your social life to the point were you can’t say hello to your opposite sex friends or talk to them at all without having an issue with your partner there’s something wrong and is often the cause of a breakup.

Possessiveness

“I don’t like your friends, your mother is so nosy, your work is shitty you should not work there anymore, we are a couple we should be together everywhere we go”  when someone wants to become your siamese twin and every single activity that you want to do without them is the cause of a conflict or of his/hers unhappiness, you are with a possessive partner, they will only feel happy when you are isolated from the world and only live and breathe for them. What a nightmare.

Manipulation disguised as need

You are out with your friends, you receive a call from your loved one telling you they’re sick and feeling bad and you suddenly feel guilty for not being with them, or right before leaving you got in to a huge fight and you end up leaving late or not going at all!  Somehow this happens more often than not, they might trick you in to their caprices by making you think their unhappiness is your fault so it’s your responsibility to fix it and you feel guilty when you don’t. Not healthy!

Violence

Some passion is nice and lights some fire in to the relationship, but thinking that being verbally or physically aggressive is just a higher expression of passion is just a twisted way of excusing this wrong behavior, violence is NEVER good in a romantic relationship. It eventually causes fear and mistrusts something that should not be part of a “loving relationship” Walk away of a bad situation while you can.

I know best

Everything that you like is wrong, your music, your movies, your clothing, your books, your friends, all of your opinions are stupid especially if your opinion is different to his/hers. They will try to “enlighten” you with their “absolute wisdom” because they love you and want you to be the best of the best, BS! The truth is that this is narcissistic behavior, they want a partner with no challenges, just a reflection of themselves, a constant reassurance of their “superiority”. If you left yourself out and accept becoming their pet, little by little you will become a shadow of yourself, no identity, no personality but the one they impose on you. Don’t lose yourself no one is worth it.

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